Geek Beat’s 2014 April Fool’s Spectacular

It’s that time of year again, the day that you can’t believe anything you read on the internet. No, not because of the false French Models (Bonjour!), but because it’s the official holiday of pranksters everywhere: April Fool’s Day. This April Fool’s, we want you to get in the act and help us out. Click on this forum post and tell us the best you’ve seen from the internet. We want your fake new stories, your pranks, and your overall April 1st hilarity.

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Now, let the fun begin. Refresh this page periodically throughout the day to see the latest.

Geek Beat Hits Home Video!

While you’re at it, go and check our newest addition to the Geek Beat Store: our show on VHS. Sure we’re supposed to be about this internet thingy, but some of you aren’t that technologically inclined. We want everyone to experience the awesomeness that is Cali Lewis (and that John P. guy, too), even those who are a generation or two behind on tech. If those go well enough, we’re also contemplating Laser Disc and Beta. Remember folks, Please be kind, rewind.

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Full Details Coming Later Today.

Google Maps Pokemon

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YMD6xELI_k&feature=youtu.be

Ever want to hunt wild Pokemon? Nope, well too bad anyway. Google wants to make you a Pokemon master and help you do it. This amazing feature is baked into the newest updates of Google Maps for iOS and Android as well as the web interface. You can find out all the incredibly annoying awesome details at this blog post. Watch the video too.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

PhotoBombs With the Hoff

HoffPhotoBomb

Pokemon not your thing? About how Photobombs with the Hoff?!!! Yes, you can now have David Hasselhoff automatically join in your photo adventures with Google+’s newest auto-awesome feature. Why would anyone not want this? Read all about it here.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Auto-Awesome for Resumes

Oh, and Google’s auto-awesome feature is no longer limited to just photos and videos. Auto-awesome for Resumes could help you land that dream job by adding cool effects and themes based on your interests and expertise to your personal resume!

http://youtu.be/8IeWkXmPqpA

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Samsung Fingers

Samsung Fingers

With 2014 looking increasing like the year of the wearable, Samsung has introduced a device that allows you to literally “talk to the hand”. Samsung Fingers is the Korean tech giant’s first wearable glove. It boasts a super flexible and sensitive Emo-LED display, and Flatulence Auditory Reproduction – which is activated by pulling a designated finger. Read all about it here.

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Gmail Shelfie

Gmail Shelfie April Fools

Here’s something from Google that could have been introduced just for Cali – Gmail Shelfie, the SHareable sELFIE! You know that selfie you’ve been using as your Gmail theme? With a few clicks you now share it with your mom, boss, partner, anyone at all! Now, Cali is a little too sensible reserved to share hers with the entire world, but thankfully John P. did it for her (isn’t he kind?) – just click here to add Cali to your Gmail. Read all about it here.

[Added by Paul Dixon]

SelfieBot

Wow, Jason Wynn (JBird) found something that combines Cali’s love of robots with her current selfie obsession – the SelfieBot from Sphero makers Orbotix! Apparently, it’s “Always watching… for life’s precious moments”. Reserve yours here. Thanks for sharing Jason!

http://youtu.be/ZaR4X2iJo6M

Update: Typical, turns out Cali already has her very own SelfieBot! Here’s a photo she snapped with it:

Cali Selfie from SelfieBot

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Nokia 3310 Update

3310-pureview-in-line1

A little report from Jani Turunen about Finnish phone maker and soon to be Microsoft division Nokia. Apparently the Lumia line isn’t doing as well as they hoped. So, they’ve gone back to basics and combined a fan favorite, the Nokia 3310 with the best of the Windows Phone technology like a Windows Phone Touchscreen and a 41MP PureView Camera. Come on guys, everyone who didn’t have a Motorola back in the day had a Nokia. You loved the original 3310, so give them another chance.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Sony Power Food

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPRYB_PNWlA

Sony has made a breakthrough in food technology technology and announced Power Foods. They created the Voltaic Enzyme that turns your food into fuel for your food. No outlet? Bam! Turn your bowl of Cheerios…I mean Power Loops or your hot dog or the fish you ear for every meal into a place to charge your USB deices. Not even Cali can pass that up.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Tiger Direct Nuclear Reactor

Tiger Direct Kube

UPSes and Generators are sooooo last year. Tiger Direct is now going to sell you your own friggin’ Nuclear Reactor! The Kube X-15 has a plutonium core food for 50 years and delivers 1000 KXGE (no, that’s a radio station)….err a crapload of power. Its even keeps you safe from the Radiation…. wait, it doesn’t say anything about that.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Rosetta Stone for Klingon

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nn1VjbJtx-4

DaHjaj QaQ jaj Geek Beat legh! There is one language of interstellar Awesomeness: Klingon. You can learn to speak like a real warrior using the highly regarded Rosetta Stone software. You can known read Shakespeare in the original Klingon as it was meant to be. Just be careful though, the world of a Klingon warrior is rough and people have known to get hurt, so be careful who insult. Now, if you excuse me, I’m going Targ hunting with Emperor Khaless. Thanks to Jason “JBird” Wynn for that one. Qapla’!

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Redbox Mood Match

Redbox-Mood-Match

We all know that choosing Redbox DVDs can be a pain. Further more, the 10 people standing behind you are starting to get a little angry. Now Redbox will choose a movie for game for you with Mood Match. Just let the Redbox Kiosk read your palm and It’ll reveal the perfect title for you. It turns blue? You need a comedy? It turns green, how about a little first person shooter action. It turns gold and you get Sandra Bullock looking good in space for a couple hours. I need to see that movie again. What was I saying? Anyway, it may, but probably won’t, be available at your local Redbox.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

HTC Gluuv

HTC Gluuv April Fools

Samsung isn’t the only company to have announced plans for a wearable glove today. HTC has unveiled the futuristic looking Gluuv. Designed to work seamlessly with the new HTC One (M8), the Gluuv boasts Social Fingerz which allow you to literally give things the thumbs up, an 87.2-megapixel selfie camera (perfect for Cali), and you can pair it with the HTC BoomBass handle to “unleash sound like never before”. Read all about it here.

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Newegg PetEgg

Newegg has something to keep the kids amused – PetEgg. Kind of like a Tamagotchi (but more awesome), Mr. Nogginz is described as your new ultra-low maintenance tech-loving best friend. Whenever you shop with your Newegg account you can earn “YUM POINTS” that you can use to feed Mr. Nogginz. PettEgg NewEgg April Fools

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Dehydration BackPack

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xm7itTCHQk4&feature=youtu.be

You see them all the time, people and their hydration backpacks. How are you supposed to throw an outdoor party with those? You need a Dehydration Pack from SanFran-based bag maker Timbuk2. This one hold a full keg. Just think, a nice long hike or bike ride with your own keg, with your favorite malt beverage. Just remember, wear responsibly and you need to be 21 to own this pack.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Apple Acquires iFixit

iFixit-Apple

Bad news for iFixit fans, they’ve sold out to Apple. Apparently they felt that Apple throwing a gob load of money at them was enough to get them to stop making videos to show me I can’t fix my iMac. Sure Apple has pledged to be more repairable, but who believes that.

And Tim Cook while you’re buying people off…

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Cats by Opera

Here’s something The Kreepy Kitty would love, at least if he was still around (apparently he quit this morning), a web browser designed for cats from Opera. By the way, if you know of Kreepy’s whereabouts drop a comment below!

http://youtu.be/RmxDXhU8CfE

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Razer Eidolon Wearable Drone

Ever wish you could play your life like you play a video game? Well, now you can! Razer has announced the Razer Eidolon – The World’s First Wearable Drone System and UAV 3rd-Person Camera. Read all about it here.

http://youtu.be/NXgmlDuTz7w

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Robot Dog Sitter

Robot-dog-walker

Everyone knows about robotic vacuum cleaners, but what about robot dog sitters? Hammacher Schlemmer now sells the robot that will watch Fluffy or Zoomer while you’re off watching Geek Beat. The robot has settings for walk times and will play with your pooch when she’s ready to go and you aren’t. It’ll even pick up your dog’s “accidents” for you and groom and wash your dog. Holy crap, this thing pretty much does everything you’re supposed to do as a pet owner. That being said, looking at my 81-pound Golden Retriever, I’m going to need a bigger ‘bot.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Blzzard’s Outcast

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iim–3_NggU&feature=youtu.be

There are two kinds of games in this world: awesome Blizzard games and everything else. They’re announced a brand new old one today called Outcasts: Vengeance of the Vanquished. They’re bring the 2D Goodness in this button masher that features games from over 20 years of Blizzard awesomeness. Just think Mortal Kombat meets Warcraft, Starcraft and Diablo. There’s even an awesome 32 button controller with credit card reader for all the in-app purchases. And if you want to absolutely in, the match system will set you up with some noob you’re sure to pwn. Blizzard, you rock! Now I gotta forget this writing stuff and go play WoW.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Kickstarter Changes Name

Kickstart April Fool

Don’t you just love it when companies change their names? That’s what Kickstarter has announced today. From now on, the crowfunding site will be called Kickstartr – yep, that’s right, they removed the “e” from the name. According to a post on the company’s blog, dropping the “e” will save a collective 14 TB of data usage annually. Read all about it here.

[Added by Paul Dixon]

Chrome Goes Emoji

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G3NXNnoGr3Y&feature=youtu.be

The language of the web isn’t English, its Emoji. Google understands and is updating its Chrome Apps For iOS and Android with a translate to Emoji mode. Now you can…well…I really can’t write in Emoji, can I? Anywho, if you the web in the cute modern version of hieroglyphics, you can have it. Works only from English, sorry Japan.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

Flux Capacitor Car Charger

Flux-Charger

Be honest, who wouldn’t want a Flux Capacitor car charger with enough juice to charge two tablets while glowing like the real thing? Think Geek, this better be real. As soon as they door release this, we need to find an excuse to travel to the UK to install one in Steve Thompson’s DeLorean. $40 well spent.

[Added by Ben Roethig]

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